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SUA CASA CAI - YOUR HOUSE FALLS

te te te te near to heart attack. I think, 'Fucking done! Okay, take me.' He comes close, looking at me, then doof, he passes, goes to the guy in the seat behind. Was the scariest five seconds of my life.

And then the plane still doesn't take off. I think, now they are going to come back for me. 'More wine, please, I need wine.' I think, 'Why don't we take off? Why doesn't this shit go up?' Was fucking bad time. I was praying, making promises: 'God, I promise if I see my kids again, if I reach Bali safe, I'm gonna stop this shit. Please help me, God, I want to see my kids again. Please, please God.' I didn't realise they were just taking his bag off ... We waited one hour.

I make it to Bali again. Free. But when I come back everything was falling down ... I quit the business. No money, oh ... and then I decide I'm going to sell the house, start to do business, but my brilliant wife doesn't take to losing everything and being normal. She says, 'No, we're not going to sell the house. I'm gonna go to Sweden and do by myself.' I say, 'No, don't do.'

A couple of months before, when I was in Brazil, she tried to kill herself. She was alcoholic - drink every day. Cut her wrists in the tower ... crazy ... she think I get a girlfriend and left her, but I was looking to fix our money situation. That's the price I pay for all the shit.

- Rafael

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Rafael had had enough. He'd seen too many friends ruin their lives and he wanted to start a normal life. He also desperately wanted to quit using blow, as he knew that it was his addiction that had kept him in the game for so long, as well as destroying his lungs. 'One day I say, "Fuck, I'm gonna die. I can't use this shit anymore."' He'd tried to abstain while away, but failed, especially as every time he packed the coke the stuff

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